JoAnne Pedro-Carroll

How to Avoid Conflict & Coparent Well in Challenging Times

The Coronavirus has thrown us all for a loop, forcing us to take on multiple roles at once. Parents are struggling to work from home and homeschool our children at the same time, all while managing financial challenges and fears around the health and safety of the people we love. And divorced parents have the added pressure of coparenting in a time when our parenting plans just aren’t feasible. So, what can we do to avoid conflict with our ex and show up for our kids as the best possible version of ourselves?

Clinical psychologist Dr. JoAnne Pedro-Carroll is an internationally recognized expert in the field of children and divorce, appearing regularly as a keynote speaker at conferences around the globe. She has 35 years of clinical experience helping families navigate the transitions that accompany divorce and often serves as a child specialist in the collaborative law process. JoAnne is also the bestselling author of Putting Children First: Proven Parenting Strategies for Helping Children Thrive Through Divorce.

On this special edition of Divorce Dialogues, JoAnne joins Katherine to discuss the heightened stresses divorced parents are dealing with right now and encourage coparents who are struggling to reach out to a neutral third party. She explains why our brains tend toward fight, flight or freeze in circumstances like these and what we can do to respond rather than react—and be the kind of parent we really want to be. Listen in for JoAnne’s insight on seeing your ex as a respected colleague in the business of raising your children and learn how you can help your child build resilience and thrive through divorce AND quarantine.

Topics Covered

The stresses divorced parents are dealing with through COVID-19

• Emotions heightened in times of uncertainty
• Overwhelmed with managing multiple roles

What to do when one parent wants to follow the parenting plan but the other is fearful

Why it’s crucial to have a safe space for thinking through your options

The value of a neutral third party to facilitate problem-solving (e.g.: family counselor)

When our brains tend toward fight, flight or freeze + why that’s not optimal for collaboration

The relationship between self-care and our ability to be the kind of parent we want to be

Why asking for help is a sign of strength rather than weakness

Protecting your child’s health vs. trying to control your ex

Renegotiating your relationship with your ex as business partners in raising children

How conflict between parents adds to a child’s anxiety, fear and worry

The two most powerful predictors of a child’s resilience in divorce

1. Parents’ ability to contain conflict
2. Quality of parenting itself

Connect with JoAnne Pedro-Carroll

JoAnne’s Website

Connect with Katherine Miller

The Center for Understanding Conflict

Miller Law Group

Katherine on LinkedIn

The New Yorker’s Guide to Collaborative Divorce by Katherine Miller

Email katherine@miller-law.com

Call (914) 738-7765

Resources

Putting Children First: Proven Parenting Strategies for Helping Children Thrive Through Divorce by JoAnne Pedro-Carroll, PhD

JoAnne on Divorce Dialogues EP035

The post How to Avoid Conflict & Coparent Well in Challenging Times with JoAnne Pedro-Carroll appeared first on Divorce Dialogues.

Barbara Newman-Mannix

Navigating Eldercare in the Coronavirus Era

For adult children with aging parents, the current health crisis is particularly stressful. Some of us are caring for Mom or Dad at home without the help we’re used to. Others are cut off from our loved ones in nursing homes or assisted living facilities. So, what’s the best way to navigate our new role as caregiver if an elderly parent is home with us? Or stay connected to our aging parents if we can’t see them face-to-face?

Barbara Newman-Mannix is the Founder and CEO of A Dignified Life, a consultancy that helps families understand and manage major life transitions. ADL develops care plans for elder parents and loved ones with chronic illness, connecting families with the professional services they need. Barbara is a fierce advocate for families, supporting them through the difficult healthcare, insurance, legal and financial challenges that come with navigating change around eldercare, end-of-life, divorce or special needs.

On this special episode of Divorce Dialogues, Barbara joins Katherine to discuss eldercare in the Coronavirus era. She offers advice on caring for a senior parent while you’re working from home or staying connected to a loved one you cannot visit in a nursing home or assisted living facility. Listen in for Barbara’s insight on managing stress through the COVID-19 crisis and learn how you can keep your elderly parents safe and happy—whether you’re in the same physical space or not.

Topics Covered

Barbara’s advice on caring for a parent while working from home

• Create work/entertainment space for senior
• Set timer for breaks or set up video camera

Creating boundaries so that you can be productive at home

The special challenge around caring for a parent with dementia

How to stay connected if you’re separated from a senior parent

• Share information with family of roommate
• Send flowers, photos to enhance environment
• Create levity in phone conversations
• Use GamePigeon or listen to/read same book

Why it’s crucial to show empathy for the staff at a parent’s facility

Barbara’s insight on managing stress through the COVID-19 crisis

• Sleep and eat well, drink water
• Limit consumption of negative news
• Get fresh air when possible

Why it’s a good time to explore estate planning with your family

Connect with Barbara Newman-Mannix

A Dignified Life

Call (914) 475-7225

Connect with Katherine Miller

The Center for Understanding Conflict

Miller Law Group

Katherine on LinkedIn

The New Yorker’s Guide to Collaborative Divorce by Katherine Miller

Email katherine@miller-law.com

Call (914) 738-7765

Resources

GamePigeon

NY State Health Care Proxy Form

NY State Power of Attorney Form

The post Navigating Eldercare in the Coronavirus Era with Barbara Newman-Mannix appeared first on Divorce Dialogues.

Steve Kaplan

Divorce & Your Finances in a COVID-19 Economy

The Coronavirus has us all concerned about both our physical and financial health. The economic impact of the pandemic has changed the value of everything overnight, making the process of dividing assets for a divorce settlement particularly challenging. So, what’s the best way to cope with the uncertainty? And what are our options if we need cash in hand right now?

Steve Kaplan is the founder and owner of Steve Kaplan CPA, a practice focused on dispute resolution services out of White Plains, NY. He has 30-plus years of experience in public practice, developing an expertise in business valuation, financial analysis and settlement support. Steve is trained in Collaborative Divorce Practice and mediation, and he is often called upon to speak on a variety of tax, forensic accounting and matrimonial dissolution topics.

On this special episode of Divorce Dialogues, Steve joins Katherine to offer advice on dealing with the current economic uncertainty, reminding us that portfolio values always come back after a downturn. He weighs in on how to think about the valuation of assets if you’re getting a divorce right now, explaining the benefits of choosing the collaborative process when it comes to real estate and business valuation. Listen in for Steve’s insight around the benefits available to those of us who need cashflow now and learn how to take advantage of the changes to the tax code initiated by COVID-19.

Topics Covered

Steve’s advice on dealing with the current economic uncertainty

• Portfolio values come back after downturn
• Value today less relevant than at exit
• Taking action now may compound problems

The benefits available to those of us who need cash in hand now

• Increase in unemployment benefits
• Small business loans available at low interest rates (e.g.: PPP)
• Opportunity to borrow from retirement account
• $1200 checks issued automatically to most taxpayers

How to think about real estate valuation if you’re dividing assets now

Why business valuation is more challenging in the Coronavirus era

The benefits of collaborative divorce in terms of business valuation

Steve’s insight on the changes to the tax code initiated by COVID-19

• Penalty for borrowing from retirement account waved
• Minimum distribution requirements waived in 2020
• Date to file/make first payment on taxes moved to 7/15

Connect with Steve Kaplan

1. Kaplan CPA

Call (914) 733-7340

Email skaplan@skaplancpa.com

Connect with Katherine Miller

The Center for Understanding Conflict

Miller Law Group

Katherine on LinkedIn

The New Yorker’s Guide to Collaborative Divorce by Katherine Miller

Email katherine@miller-law.com

Call (914) 738-7765

Resources

CARES Act

SBA Loans

Paycheck Protection Program

SECURE Act

The post Divorce & Your Finances in a COVID-19 Economy with Steve Kaplan appeared first on Divorce Dialogues.

Michelle Smith

Managing Divorce in the Coronavirus Era

There is no precedent for how to negotiate a divorce under the current circumstances. We simply can’t ask what a division of assets looks like during a Coronavirus pandemic because it’s never happened before! So, how can divorcing couples get creative and collaborate on financially neutral solutions that serve both parties?

Michelle Smith is the Founder and CEO of Source Financial Advisors, a wealth management and divorce financial planning firm based in New York City. Michelle has spent the majority of her 29 year career helping clients navigate complex financial issues, and as a Certified Divorce Financial Analyst designation and divorce mediator, has a specialty in divorce. She has recently created and trademarked a 12-month educational program for women transitioning from divorce to their own financial independence called Wife2CFO.

On this special episode of the podcast, Michelle joins Katherine to explain why there’s never been a better time for divorce mediation and share her strategy for building an interim rescue plan for divorcing couples. She offers advice for people who rely on their portfolio to pay the bills, discussing how divorcing couples should think about their investments in light of the market drop and why it may be in their best interest to keep some assets tied together for the time being. Listen in for Michelle’s insight around how current circumstances are forcing us to rethink what really matters and learn how a financial planner can help you find creative, financially neutral solutions in divorce.

Topics Covered

How divorcing couples should think about their investments given the market drop

Michelle’s response to someone who says they can’t afford to get divorced right now

Why it’s an ideal time to find financially neutral solutions through mediation

Building an interim rescue plan for couples who still want to divorce

How the health crisis facilitates a personal financial reset on what matters

The current opportunity for attorneys to encourage creative solutions

The danger in waiting until everything is back to normal to negotiate your divorce

Why it may be in a divorcing couple’s interest to keep their assets tied together

Michelle’s advice for people who rely on their portfolio to pay the bills

Why Michelle uses sustainable rate of withdrawal vs. investment rate of return

Why it’s crucial to have 12 months of expenses liquid and available

What makes the ability to collaborate a massive strength rather than a weakness

Michelle’s insight around our responsibility not to freeze in fear right now

Connect with Michelle Smith

Source Financial Advisors

Email msmith@sourcefa.com

Call (917) 539-2117

Connect with Katherine Miller

The Center for Understanding Conflict

Miller Law Group

Katherine on LinkedIn

The New Yorker’s Guide to Collaborative Divorce by Katherine Miller

Email katherine@miller-law.com

Call (914) 738-7765

Disclaimer: Source Financial Advisors, LLC is a registered investment advisor with the U.S. Securities and Exchange Commission (“SEC”). The comments provided are for informational purposes only and is not intended as an offer, or a solicitation of an offer, to buy or sell any investment or specific product.

The post Managing Divorce in the Coronavirus Era with Michelle Smith appeared first on Divorce Dialogues.