Risa Garon

Helping Children Build Resilience Through Divorce

Though most divorcing couples intend to put the best interests of their children first, their own emotions get in the way. So, how can divorced parents learn to prioritize their children’s needs and create a trusting and constructive co-parenting relationship? How can they help their kids build resilience in the aftermath of divorce?

Risa Garon is the Co-founder and Executive Director of the National Family Resiliency Center (NFRC), an organization that provides counseling and educational programs to help children and adults cope, heal and navigate through divorce and other family transitions. Risa is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker and Certified Family Life Educator with nearly 30 years of experience helping separating, and divorced couples develop parenting plans that focus on the developmental needs of the children involved.

On this episode of Divorce Dialogues, Risa joins Katherine to explain why it’s challenging for divorcing parents to put the best interests of their children first. She walks us through the four components of NFRC’s child-focused decision-making model, discussing how she considers what both parents want—but prioritizes the child’s needs. Listen in for insight on dealing with high-conflict parents and get Risa’s advice on minimizing stress over the holidays after a divorce.

Topics Covered

Why it’s challenging for divorcing parents to put the best interests of their children first

The four components of NFRC’s child-focused decision-making model

Risa’s insight on how to deal with parents in a high-conflict divorce

How Risa considers what both parents want but prioritizes their children’s needs

Training mental health professionals, judicial officers, attorneys and mediators to mitigate conflict

Risa’s advice for minimizing stress over the holidays post-divorce

Successful examples of incorporating old holiday traditions with new ones after a divorce

Why Risa encourages divorced parents to chip in on one gift rather than buying presents separately

What grieving parents can do on holidays they spend without their kids

Connect with Risa Garon

National Family Resiliency Center

Call (410) 740-9553

Connect with Katherine Miller

The Center for Understanding Conflict

Miller Law Group

Katherine on LinkedIn

The New Yorker’s Guide to Collaborative Divorce by Katherine Miller

Email katherine@miller-law.com

Call (914) 738-7765

Resources

Books by Risa Garon

The post Helping Children Build Resilience Through Divorce with Risa Garon appeared first on Divorce Dialogues.

Dr. JoAnne Pedro-Carroll

Parenting Strategies to Help Children Thrive Through Divorce

Parents worry about the long-term impact divorce will have on their children. The good news is that two-thirds of the children of divorce are just fine. The bad news is that one-third are, indeed, disadvantaged by long-term problems. What can parents do to ensure that their children fall in to the resilient category—and go on to thrive in the aftermath of divorce?

Dr. JoAnne Pedro-Carroll is recognized internationally as an authority in the field of children and divorce, speaking regularly at conferences all over the world and consulting with universities, schools, courts and health agencies on matters relating to child mental health and parenting. Additionally, she continues to work with children and families in private practice and serves as a child specialist in the collaborative divorce process. Dr. Pedro-Carroll held faculty positions in psychology and psychiatry at the University of Rochester from 1984 to 2008 and was a Senior Researcher at the Children’s Institute in Rochester, New York. She serves as an advisor to Sesame Street on its Little Children, Big Challenges initiative, and she is the author of Putting Children First: Proven Parenting Strategies for Helping Children Thrive Through Divorce.

Today, Dr. Pedro-Carroll sits down with Katherine to address what parents can do to help their children demonstrate resilience through the divorce process. She explains the misguided view that taking the high road makes you vulnerable and the impact of long-term resentment on your ability to parent effectively. Dr. Pedro-Carroll offers insight around the role of the child specialist in the collaborative divorce process and the feasibility of bird nesting as a workable solution for divorcing families. Listen in for the factors to consider in the development of an effective parenting plan and learn how to give you kids a voice in the process.

Topics Covered

The challenge of managing emotions of fear, loss and grief through divorce

The statistics around long-term problems exhibited by children of divorce

• 1/3 suffer from long-term issues
• 2/3 make healthy adjustment

The two most powerful predictive factors for resilient children of divorce

1. Extent to which parents contain conflict
2. Quality of parenting, relationship between children and parents

The misguided view that taking the high road makes you vulnerable

How holding onto resentment impacts parenting in a negative way

The value in keeping families out of court with alternative processes

Dr. Pedro-Carroll’s take on bird nesting as a short-term solution

Dr. Pedro-Carroll’s insight on developing a parenting schedule

• Based on children’s ages, circumstances
• Allow for frequent contact with both parents
• Test different plans, reassess as necessary

How to give children a voice in the parenting plan without the burden of choice

The child specialist’s role in the collaborative divorce process

• Guide parents in understanding children’s needs, worries

How the way you tell children about the divorce sets the tone moving forward

Connect with Dr. JoAnne Pedro-Carroll

Dr. Pedro-Carroll’s Website

Resources

Putting Children First: Proven Parenting Strategies for Helping Children Thrive Through Divorce by JoAnne Pedro-Carroll

Connect with Katherine Miller

The Center for Understanding Conflict

Miller Law Group

Katherine on LinkedIn

The New Yorker’s Guide to Collaborative Divorce by Katherine Miller

Email katherine@westchesterfamilylaw.com

Call (914) 738-7765

The post Parenting Strategies to Help Children Thrive Through Divorce with Dr. JoAnne Pedro-Carroll appeared first on Divorce Dialogues.